The time had come for me to finally put all the sub qual crap behind me. It involved going around and getting signatures on a 4 page “qual card.” I had finally gotten all the requisite signatures and was ready to go to my board. A board usually lasts an hour at the most; mine …
Continue reading “TACO QUALIFIES IN SUBMARINES, Qual Board 14 Oct 2004”
TRE is all about forward personnel: torpedo room, fire control, navigation, etc… We had three days in port after ORSE — one of which was spent on duty. On one of the two days I had off, I was at the Ala Moana Mall when I got a call from my buddy Hokie. We were …
Continue reading “Tactical Readiness Examination, July 2004”
After being underway for a month or so, we submariners start to laugh at the dumbest shit. We also start to behave like complete jack-asses. There was one particular RC-Div buddy of mine, Mongo, who was in my watch section and could always be counted on to provide ample hilarity in times of monotony. Also, …
June 25, 2004: Submarine is crippled… like Timmy After of the aforementioned in-port tomfoolery [which was awesome] it was time for Engineering Department to get down to business. We had just completed an extended maintenance period, and it was now time to get back out to sea and punch holes in the ocean once again. It …
Continue reading “Lost All Hydraulics, Boat Is Crippled Like Timmy”
June 5, 2004 One of my favorite ways to spend a Sunday after a hard night of drinking was to hit up Duke’s in Waikiki and kick it at the beach. It was always a safe bet that there would be tons of cool chicks, a few asshole tourists, maybe a steel-drum band, lots of …
Continue reading “Guido Gets Banned From the Catamaran …Forever”
Entry for May 28, 2004: SNOB Turnover Dick -> Willie On a nuclear powered submarine, the dudes who work in the engineering department are known as “Nukes.” Subsequently, those dudes whom have minimal time left until their expected separation date can call themselves “short.” Henceforth, the Shortest Nuke On Board can be transformed into …
Entry for April 3, 2004: Some dude punched my car window Chuck had the brilliant idea that night that we should all roll out to some random beer party. I had no clue who lived there but they had booze, kegs, a pool, hot-tub, a massive beer-bong …and Nugget. He told us via cellular telephone …
OFFICER PACKAGE AND DRB; LAST DAYS OF APRIL 2004 The Navy had a program called ‘STA-21’ whereby enlisted men can catapult themselves to the officer ranks. They are required to file paperwork and submit themselves to a rigorous interview process. It’s the Navy equivalent to a lottery and if applicants are extremely lucky, they will …
Entry for MARCH 4, 2004: Got calibrated by Chuck and Cam in ACB To get “calibrated” means you get the fuck hazed out of you. Chuck and Cam held me down in Aft Crew’s Berthing and took turns punching me in the meaty part of my legs and arms. They were my best friends in …
Eastern Pacific runs, or EastPac’s are nowhere near the ass-ramming that is a WestPac. WestPac stands for Western Pacific Deployment — I will expound upon these shenanigans later in this blog. On this particular underway, the plan was to conduct sound trials in the freeze-your-nuggets-off waters of Alaska. Basically, colder waters are better conductors of sound. …
Negative Reactivity 
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